A Fresh Perspective Towards Conflict

Now that your child is older, you might find you clash more often. It’s normal for you to disagree, but it’s also important to find ways of dealing with conflict. When we use conflict management strategies, we can help our teens to learn these important life skills too.  Conflict can be our greatest teacher for both the teen and parent. Asking yourself what we can learn from this conflict will result in growth. 

Here are some tips:
When getting ready to enter a conflict

• Pray and ask God for the wisdom needed in the coming conversation.
• Try to think back to your feelings and experiences as a young person. This can help you relate to your child.

When in the middle of  the conflict 

• Stay calm, stop what you’re doing, make eye contact and listen. Then listen some more. 
• Be open about your feelings. This can help your teen understand your perspective. For example, ‘I feel worried about your safety when I don’t know where you are’, 
  

Managing the conflict aftermath

• Try not to hold a grudge. Look for every opportunity to exemplify the grace of God.
• Remember you may not see the desired outcome right away. Be patient 
  
• Look after yourself – talking to someone you trust can help you feel better about the situation.

 Conflict with our teens is a part of life. But how we view and manage it can be the difference between broken relationships to growing ones.